Therapy-Now.com Blog

Transitioning... from school to summer tips for success!

2010-05-25T14:23:00.000-04:00

With summer fast approaching and parents lining up activities, camps, and babysitting, we offer you a few suggestions for making a smooth transition to summer!

1 - Make a schedule with some structure : the kids are use to a structure all year long, in order to help them maintain healthy boundaries, continue to use time constructively, and have a minimum of stress make some sort of schedule that everyone can live with.

2- Try to maintain consistent wake and bedtimes, this will help insure that when school begins in the fall there is a minimum of adjustment and transition related dilemmas.

3- Strike a balance between unstructured leisure time and structured activities; this will help kids to stay involved, keep boredom at bay, and prevent the summer from turning into one large never ending video game playing event!

4- Ask your child(children) what they would like to do! Give them choices, encourage them to make decisions for themselves (perhaps from a list of items you construct) that way they get some experience making decisions that have a beneficial impact on their lives before they have really big ones to make. Allowing our kids to make their own decisions improves self efficacy and self esteem.

5- Have a list of "go to" rainy day alternatives that you can quickly pull out should the need arise.

6- If your child has classroom behavior management goals, academic work over the summer, or goals set with a school psychologist; know what these are and incorporate them over the break that way when it is back to school time they will be ahead of the game not behind it.

6- Lastly and most importantly have fun! Time off from school should be a positive time for bonding, furthering your relationship with your child (children) and building memories.

2010-04-29T14:52:00.001-04:00

Heroin Use: Signs of Use Among Teens and What you Can Do About it..NOW!

Prescription pill abuse such as Oxycontin and Vicodin have been on the rise among teens and young adults on Long Island and elsewhere. Of significant concern are the high rates of abuse with the illicit drug, Heroin, and parents need to be vigilant and look for warning signs of early abuse patterns.

A sobering thought: even with the very first injection/snort/smoke or swallow of heroin, dopamine, a neurotransmitter that communicates pleasure to the brain, surges thousands of times more than normal. Soon after, however, the brain returns to normal. Because of this huge surge of dopamine, heroin becomes highly addictive, even with one use, due to the body's physical urge and the brain's psychological urge to feel that “high” again.

Early Signs of Heroin Use Among Teens:

Their behavior changes suddenly. If they are usually pleasant it may be a tip-off if they become angry/withdrawn/hostile.

If they are high, they may appear drowsy, slur their speech, their pupils become constricted, they may complain of being nauseous and/or have runny noses.

They change the people they hang out with. They will start to hang out with other heroin users to the exclusion of their old-trusted friends.

You hear talk of or see emails/texts that mention: Chiba or Chiva, Smack, Junk, Brown Sugar, Skag, H, Tar, or Mud.

You find items that are used to get high on heroin: coffee grinders (that are used to cut the heroin down into a powder to snort), needles or actual syringes, and very small zipped plastic bags, or you find actual heroin, which typically looks like a white or brown powder.

They are low on cash all the time. When they run out of money from part-time jobs and have tapped out friends and family for “loans”, they will resort to stealing.

Things missing from your home, such as, TV's, that that can be sold for cash.

Signs of injection (bumps, track marks, infected sores) on their body.

Their grades begin to slip and they start to miss/ditch school or if they are working, they start to have trouble at work or fail to go to work

What to do NOW!
1. LOOK for the warning signs of drug use listed above.
2. LISTEN to your children; speak openly about the dangers of using drugs.
3. PAY ATTENTION to who your teen hangs out with and where...get to know their friend's parents
4. BE MINDFUL... have their grades changed suddenly? Are they less interested in things like sports or hobbies that they had previously been? Do they try and spend less and less time with the family than they had been previously? Has their social network changed?
5. DO THEY suddenly care less and less about their appearance, their grooming etc... are their sleep patterns changing, are they losing weight?
6. ARE THEY becoming unusually depressed, agitated, withdrawn, or fearful/paranoid?

What to do if you suspect your child is using heroin or other drugs:

TAKE ACTION immediately if you see signs of abuse or trust your gut that something is wrong..it is better to have your child angry at you for asking for a urine/drug test or ability to search their room than to have to help them get out of the grips of an addiction.

SPEAK UP... talk to the person about your concerns, get it out in the open.

AVOID blame, the goal is to get the person help not to dissect why this happened, there is always time for that later.

CALL a mental health professional and/or turn to your child's school counselors or your family doctor for assistance.

GET THERAPY for your child and perhaps for the family. Over 50% of teen drug users are also found to have an underlying psychological disorder such as depression and heroin is used as self-medication. It is important that these underlying disorders be diagnosed and addressed by a professional.

If you have concerns that your teen may be abusing drugs, call us NOW at Holtz Psychological Services, we are here to help : (631) 427-6669.

Positive Parenting: Praise vs. Punishment

2010-04-14T13:55:00.002-04:00

We have all heard the admonishment that you catch more flies with sugar than you do with salt, the same holds true with parenting... you get much further with praise then you do with punishment. Try these tips NOW! in order to begin enriching your relationship with your child (children) and increasing your parenting effectiveness:

Be super-enthusiastic when using praise (think head cheerleader)
Be specific - tell your child exactly what they did that pleased you (if you want to see it again!)
Smile, smile, smile, and use touch, a hug, a pat on the back makes us all feel good.
Make sure the praise immediately follows the behavior.
Tell your child the things you love about them as people not just what they do but compliment them for who they are!

Mindfulness Therapy

2010-04-09T23:42:00.002-04:00

Mindfulness is the aware, balanced acceptance of the present experience. It isn't more complicated than that. It is opening to or receiving the present moment, pleasant or unpleasant, just as it is, without either clinging to it or rejecting it. -Sylvia Boornstein

2010-04-05T15:19:00.001-04:00

Coming soon to the HPS blog... "Sex... Now that we have your attention! Sex in the information age how is technology effecting our sexual appetites"

2010-04-02T10:23:00.001-04:00

Spring is a time of re-growth and renewal... Where and how can you grow, how can you better care for YOURSELF? Take the time NOW!

A Poem of Emotional Growth

2010-04-01T21:02:00.002-04:00

After A While

(alternate title: Comes the Dawn)

After a while you learn

the subtle difference between

holding a hand and chaining a soul,

and you learn that

love doesn't mean leaning

and company doesn't mean security,

and you begin to learn

that kisses aren't contracts

and presents aren't promises,

and you begin to accept your defeats

with your head held up

and your eyes ahead,

with the grace of a woman,

not the grief of a child,

and you learn to build all of your roads

on today because tomorrow's ground

is too uncertain for plans,

and futures have a way of

falling down in mid-flight.

After a while you learn that

even sunshine burns

if you get too much.

So you plant your own garden

and decorate your own soul,

instead of wating for someone

to bring you flowers.

And you learn that

you really can endure...

That you really do have worth.

And you learn and you learn...

With every goodbye you learn.

-Veronica A. Shoffstall

2010-04-01T07:14:00.001-04:00

Meditation for the day...

"Do Not Cling to that Which Changes"
- The Buddha

Sleep and Academic Performance

2010-02-19T15:11:00.001-05:00

School aged children and their parents often get into arguments about bedtime, curfews, and other "sleep" issues. A recent series of studies has addressed the impact that sleep schedules have upon academic performance in school aged and college aged children and adolescents. The study divided participants into three groups, those who went to bed, routinely relatively early and woke up in the morning at a consistent and early time; a second group who went to bed late and woke early; and a third group whose sleep and wake times varied. There was a significant difference between the groups, with those students who went to bed early and woke up early (at the same times daily) performed better academically than students in the other two groups. This study, rather clearly has shown that those who get to bed at an early and consistent time, and get up at relatively the same time each day fare better academically then their more inconsistent and late "staying up" peers. If you or anyone you know needs help with parenting issues like these please call the parenting professionals at Holtz Psychological Services, P.C.

Seasonal Affective Disorder or Winter Blues

2009-11-29T15:34:00.002-05:00

Often, individuals who suffer with depression experience a worsening of symptoms during the late fall and early winter; for some depression has a seasonal component and is called Seasonal Affective Disorder. Seasonal Affective Disorder or S.A.D. symptoms worsen with the decreasing hours of sunlight in the late fall, often peaking once daylight savings time begins. Psychotherapy, and in some cases medication, is helpful for those suffering with increased depression during the winter months. Light boxes the simulate UV rays are found helpful by some. Holtz Psychological Services, in addition to therapy recommends the following:

Stay busy during day light hours and increase physical activity. Simply walking for 30minutes a day can significantly improve mood in those who are sedentary.

Get up early and go to bed early – maximizing your daylight waking hours.

Maintain health eating habits.

Stay socially connected to people you enjoy being around; no hibernation!

Consider using a high quality vitamin supplement such as Holtz Psychological Services own custom formulation “Stress Less and Focus” which is designed to increase energy, improve sleep, enhance concentration, and assist with tension and anxiety.

Try to embrace the seasons for what they are – notice beauty in nature even in the winter.

If you or someone you know is suffering with SAD or depression please do not hesitate to call on us!

Assertiveness and Communication Styles

2009-11-17T07:52:00.003-05:00

One of the more common relationship problems people seeking help discuss is communication. Each and every relationship has a unique dynamic of communication. Individual relational styles run the gamut from passive to aggressive. Passive communicators favor a style that includes withholding ones true feelings, beliefs, needs, and opinions, in favor of accepting and supporting their partners’. Over time the passive communicator develops resentments and often feels neglected by their partner. Long term feelings of neglect and resentment often leads to passive –aggressive behavior. Aggressive communicators insist, demand, or insure that their needs, wishes, wants, and beliefs are supported irrespective of the consequences. Sometimes seen as bullish or arrogant, aggressive communicators appear interested only in their own needs.

As with most human traits, finding a middle ground is most desirable. The middle ground between passivity and aggression is assertiveness. Holtz Psychological Services’ clinical staff assists those with communication and relationship problems in finding their own assertive voice, enabling them to express their needs, wants, desires, and wishes confidently, while acknowledging the same in their partner. Assertiveness training helps bolster self confidence, improves relationships, and increases feelings of self worth. If you are interested in receiving more information about assertiveness check out our website or give us a call.

Stress and Children

2009-11-09T07:45:00.003-05:00

Stress and anxiety are common problems that we see in children who are brought to our offices. Children show signs of stress and worry in ways that are different from adults. Symptoms of stress and anxiety in children include poor school performance, nightmares, sibling conflict, increased aggression or agitation, and clingy insecure attachments to parents. Annually, the American Psychological Association (APA), publishes a report on stress, this year the APA included children in their report which was summarized by the NY Times: http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/11/05/helping-our-children-with-stress/?emc=eta1).

If you are concerned that your child or the child of a loved one is exhibiting signs of stress or anxiety there is help available. The Psychologists at Holtz Psychological Services specialize in the treatment of anxiety and stress and are here to help. If you are interested in having a psychologist speak to your social, community, or civic group about stress please call us today and we will be happy to put you in touch with a member of our speakers bureau.

Quitting Smoking

2009-11-03T16:56:00.005-05:00

Several patients over the past week have expressed interest in quitting smoking so I thought I would take a moment and post a few thoughts about this challenging habit. According to the U.S. Surgeon General, nicotine addiction (nicotine being the main culprit in tobacco addictions) is as, or more difficult to overcome than heroin:
(http://www.nytimes.com/1987/03/29/magazine/nicotine-harder-to-kickthan-heroin.html)!
If you are a smoker quitting is one of the most beneficial things you can do that will have an immediate and positive impact on your health.

In order to successfully quit smoking, it is important to take a comprehensive approach. One of the main reasons people fail when trying to quit on their own is that they often attend to only one or two facets of the addiction. HPS staff psychologists focus on comprehensive treatment, attending to the cognitive, behavioral, and physical aspects of nicotine addiction. Treatment generally consists of addressing the underlying thoughts and beliefs that the individual has about smoking, these may include the role of smoking in managing stressful situations, mistaken beliefs about the health consequences of smoking, and underlying beliefs about social smoking. Our clinicians help you to understand your smoking triggers, work with you on developing impulse control, and help you to substitute smoking with more healthful behaviors. In many occasions recommendations for nicotine replacement therapies such as the patch or referrals for medications such as Chantix are made in order to help people break free from smoking. Hypnotherapy and biofeedback are also often utilized. If you or a loved one needs assistance in quitting smoking please do not hesitate to call us, we are here for you!

Greetings and Welcome

2009-11-02T21:30:00.004-05:00

Hello and welcome to our blog. Our staff Psychologists will be checking in regularly in order to provide you useful and timely information, answer your questions, and discuss topics of interest such as managing stress and anxiety, depression, ADHD, parenting, relationships, and more. Hope you come to see us as a quality resource on the web. Best, Adam

FIRST POST

2009-11-01T15:47:00.002-05:00

Thanks for joining us! There are a lot of exciting projects in the works at Holtz Psychological Services. Our new LESS STRESS Vitamin supplement will be available in ONE WEEK, and we can begin accepting orders now. Staff of HPS will be presenting a Seminar on Stress Reduction at the Melville Public Library on January 7, 2010 at 7:00. FREE material, including a complimentary STRESS Squeeze-Ball and other practical materials will be available. Please Join Us!